Wednesday 24 August 2011
10 Things Men Wish Women Knew
10 things men wish women knew
1. Men love to be complimented. Sincerely, however, not artificially. You can't, for instance, say "I love what you've done with your apartment" if it looks like a dorm room. In a frat house.
2. Sunday equals sports. Not one game. Not two games. All the games.
3. Say what you think/ want/feel. Straight up. No hints, no insinuations, no clever allusions. Men don't do subtle. They're just not hard-wired that way.
4. When it comes to makeup, less is more.
5. When it comes to making love, more is more.
6. Frequent compliments about his talents/abilities/allures coupled with regular disregard of his shortcomings/ limitations/faults are to a man what diamonds are to a woman: remarkable, extraordinary, incomparable treasures.
7. Honest, open, undisguised desire (read: making him feel as though you want him so badly that you can hardly remember your name) is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
8. A TV screen can never be too big. It's the room that's too small.
9. Flirting is sexy. Teasing is cruel. Do not confuse the two or serious, long-lasting hard feelings could ensue.
10. When in doubt, about what to give him for any special occasion -- birthday, anniversary, just-because-it's-Tuesday-and-I-want-to-say-I-love-you--remember what F. Scott Fitzgerald said: "The greatest gift you can give anyone is to see them exactly as they wish to be seen."
Sunday 31 July 2011
LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD
We all know the saying that “blood is thicker than water”. While this statement is correct by chemical composition, I really do think that the true meaning of it has nothing to do with Chemistry. The statement is trying to differentiate the relational ‘bond’ between ‘blood relatives’ and other relationships. So by the statement, it is implied that people of same blood have a bond existing between. As true as it seems, I ask myself, what is the point of such ‘bond’ when some blood relatives can’t live together in peace and harmony? We have always heard of people using their Parents, Kids, or siblings for rituals. We have all heard of the dire fighting, cheating, stealing, and backbiting that go on between ‘blood’ relatives. Thinking deep into why these should be so, one thing keeps on playing on my mind – LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD!!
One man gets back home after a cumbersome day, he calls out to his wife “hi honey…..I’m home!” he gets the response “I’m here” and he looks around the living room only to find his wife brooding at one corner. “What’s wrong?” he asks her……and she says…. “Hi Patrick, there’s something I want to tell you”….. He asks her….”what is it? she answers "it's about our son" and he responds "Is he alright?” and she says “Patrick, he is not your real son”….he asks her “what do you mean he is not my real son?”….she says “sorry, I didn’t know how to tell you”…..he responds, “Sorry? What does that mean? But why didn’t you tell me before?” she yells “sorry!!”…and he yells back “after all these years? This is crazy!!” Along the line she explains “I got lonely sometime and you were gone like you always do. You were never there when I needed some Tender Loving Care. You were never there when I needed somebody to talk to. Somebody came and took your place” and he responds “hmm….lady, somebody took my place in your life, I can say I’m used to it by now cos it happens all the time. That is one test I have always failed, but one thing my heart will never understand is, WHO IS GONNA TAKE THE PLACE OF THIS BOY IN MY HEART? ..... Now this is the part of the story where my interest lies. How come he loved the “boy” so much when there was actually no “blood bond”? While you are thinking of what to answer, this is what still plays on my mind – LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD!!
I have always been wondering the kind of love people have for their kids when I see the kind of inhumane treatment they mete out to the other child who takes care of their household chores. How possible is it for me to truly love my children and then I can’t show love to the person that oversees their welfare (the maid)? The same maid that prepares the food we all ‘eat’ at home. I think most of us are just being fond of our kids if we can’t be compassionate towards other children in general no matter their societal status. If you read well between the lines, you will see for yourself that indeed LOVE IS THICKER BLOOD!!
When you visit a couple who don’t have a biological child, but have adopted one, it will become clearer that LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD!!
When you hear the story of a millionaire’s daughter getting married to a gravedigger’s son even though the lady’s parents were strongly against the marriage because of difference in economic class, you will begin to nod your head to the fact that LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD!!
What really creates a ‘bond’ between us isn’t the blood in our veins, but the ‘love’ in our blood – can I hear someone say ‘LOVE’ is thicker than blood?
Like I also like saying, Love is only love if it can be traced back to God. Any love that can’t be traced back to God isn’t love. It can be fondness or any other thing, but certainly not love!
Love is the compassion, affection, charity, care, and forgiveness meted out to others in the spirit of oneness.
>>>LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD<<<
Maple Dappa is an Inspirational speaker/writer
One man gets back home after a cumbersome day, he calls out to his wife “hi honey…..I’m home!” he gets the response “I’m here” and he looks around the living room only to find his wife brooding at one corner. “What’s wrong?” he asks her……and she says…. “Hi Patrick, there’s something I want to tell you”….. He asks her….”what is it? she answers "it's about our son" and he responds "Is he alright?” and she says “Patrick, he is not your real son”….he asks her “what do you mean he is not my real son?”….she says “sorry, I didn’t know how to tell you”…..he responds, “Sorry? What does that mean? But why didn’t you tell me before?” she yells “sorry!!”…and he yells back “after all these years? This is crazy!!” Along the line she explains “I got lonely sometime and you were gone like you always do. You were never there when I needed some Tender Loving Care. You were never there when I needed somebody to talk to. Somebody came and took your place” and he responds “hmm….lady, somebody took my place in your life, I can say I’m used to it by now cos it happens all the time. That is one test I have always failed, but one thing my heart will never understand is, WHO IS GONNA TAKE THE PLACE OF THIS BOY IN MY HEART? ..... Now this is the part of the story where my interest lies. How come he loved the “boy” so much when there was actually no “blood bond”? While you are thinking of what to answer, this is what still plays on my mind – LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD!!
I have always been wondering the kind of love people have for their kids when I see the kind of inhumane treatment they mete out to the other child who takes care of their household chores. How possible is it for me to truly love my children and then I can’t show love to the person that oversees their welfare (the maid)? The same maid that prepares the food we all ‘eat’ at home. I think most of us are just being fond of our kids if we can’t be compassionate towards other children in general no matter their societal status. If you read well between the lines, you will see for yourself that indeed LOVE IS THICKER BLOOD!!
When you visit a couple who don’t have a biological child, but have adopted one, it will become clearer that LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD!!
When you hear the story of a millionaire’s daughter getting married to a gravedigger’s son even though the lady’s parents were strongly against the marriage because of difference in economic class, you will begin to nod your head to the fact that LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD!!
What really creates a ‘bond’ between us isn’t the blood in our veins, but the ‘love’ in our blood – can I hear someone say ‘LOVE’ is thicker than blood?
Like I also like saying, Love is only love if it can be traced back to God. Any love that can’t be traced back to God isn’t love. It can be fondness or any other thing, but certainly not love!
Love is the compassion, affection, charity, care, and forgiveness meted out to others in the spirit of oneness.
>>>LOVE IS THICKER THAN BLOOD<<<
Maple Dappa is an Inspirational speaker/writer
Monday 21 March 2011
LETTER TO YOU
You, Yes, you. You just crossed my mind so I am writing this for you.
I know you are reading this. And I want you to know I am writing this for you. No one else will understand. No one else knows. They think that this is for them. But it’s not. I am writing this for you.
I want you to know, life…it’s hard. Every day can be a challenge. It can be a challenge to get up in the morning. To get yourself out of bed. To put on that smile. But I want you to know, that smile is what keeps me going some days. You need to remember, even through the tough times, you are amazing. You really are.
You should be happy. You are gorgeous.
I know that the weather might not be perfect. You might have to turn your back to the wind or feel the cold nipping at your nose. But you know what, at least you are there to feel it. At least you can enjoy the sun’s warm rays on your face. Or that cold February wind biting at your cheeks. You know what that means?
You are alive.
Everything will be okay.
I know you are reading this. And I want you to know I am writing this for you. No one else will understand. No one else knows. They think that this is for them. But it’s not. I am writing this for you.
I want you to know, life…it’s hard. Every day can be a challenge. It can be a challenge to get up in the morning. To get yourself out of bed. To put on that smile. But I want you to know, that smile is what keeps me going some days. You need to remember, even through the tough times, you are amazing. You really are.
You should be happy. You are gorgeous.
I know that the weather might not be perfect. You might have to turn your back to the wind or feel the cold nipping at your nose. But you know what, at least you are there to feel it. At least you can enjoy the sun’s warm rays on your face. Or that cold February wind biting at your cheeks. You know what that means?
You are alive.
Everything will be okay.
Thursday 20 January 2011
Oleku - Iceprince Ft Brymo (official Video)
The much awaited video from the stables of the Chocolate City...Enjoy
Monday 17 January 2011
NOT SURE OF A SUITABLE TITLE!
So it’s over. Maybe it was a break (which doesnt make sense to me), maybe just a breakup, but, in any case, she’s gone (deal with it). Chances are she left you, because two thirds to three quarters of most breakups in dating relationships are initiated by women. Now you’re alone -- maybe for the first time in a long while. The longer you have been in a relationship, the more daunting this may sound. But a new girlfriend may be the last thing you need right now.
We usually start lining up prospective 'babes', 'friends with benefits' and what have you even while the smell of our ex’s perfume is still lingering in the air. You may fantasise about having choices again, and as soon as friends see you as “single” some of them may offer to “fix you up” with their friend who is also newly single or want to just hook you up with random girls to keep your mind off your recent break/break up. It can be flattering, and it can be exciting, but more likely it is confusing. You may not have dated in years, and you may find the whole process more anxiety-provoking than fun.
When a relationship ends, we often say that we are going to be very cautious about our next one. Yet, the statistics show that single life tends to be short-lived for most of us. For guys whose girlfriend called it quits, that period of single life is really short-lived.
Why are we so quick to rush into another relationship you may ask? After all, if you have been in a committed relationship that has lasted for a year or more, what are the odds that the first or second woman you meet after the breakup is the perfect match for you?
Guys also may quickly start a new relationship because they dread the idea of being alone. But being alone does not necessarily imply being lonely. After all, some of the saddest cases of loneliness occur when you feel unloved tolerated or pitied in a relationship as was the case of some of us.
Some of us are anxious to jump into a new relationship in order to find a new sexual partner. If this is you, remember to use your brain, the part above the belt, and not the part below that all too often wants to call the shots (lol).
Personally, I feel the major reason that men prematurely get into a new committed relationship is to avoid the pain associated with the loss of the previous relationship. This is quite natural. Almost everybody will use pain killers to quell a headache, for example. However, the pain after a relationship ends is part of the recovery process. It makes you reevaluate the relationship, its history, the mistakes you made, and the meaning of it for your life. Most importantly, the pain can help you avoid making similar mistakes in the future. Unfortunately, people don’t really learn very well from their mistakes in relationships.
You are not ready to engage in another committed relationship soon after a breakup (FACT). You may think that you are, but you are overestimating yourself. If you have ever sustained a sports injury -- say, a sprained ankle while playing ball -- you probably remember being anxious to get back on the field as soon as possible after getting hurt. But if you rush to resume your old regimen before your ankle is fully healed, you will most likely re-injure it -- but this time the injury will be more severe and put you out of commission for a lot longer. This is exactly your situation now, but instead of your ankle being injured, it’s your “heart” that's suffering. Give it the time it needs to heal before you get into a new relationship.
Consider these thoughts as you get tempted to find a new girlfriend:
Don’t look to another woman to make you feel OK: If you are still hurting, don’t try to bandage the wound by explaining your plight to another female. She can't make it better, but you can. Instead of distracting yourself or looking to a new girlfriend to ease the pain you feel, work on self-improvement and self-understanding. The last thing you need is another failed relationship.
Find comfort in being alone: Strangely enough, unless you are comfortable being alone, you are probably not ready for a new relationship. The best relationships grow out of a desire to be with a particular person, not from the fear of being with no one at all. To be comfortable with being alone means you: don’t feel depressed when you don’t have someone with you; can take care of your own basic needs; don’t need someone else to entertain you; and can deal with not having a regular sexual partner.
Let go of your anger at your ex: Yes, she may have hurt you, but you learned at different points of your life and in different ways that two wrongs don’t make a right.
Be careful not to party too hard: Drowning your sorrows via drinking won’t change anything for the better. Instead, focus on improving yourself
Develop some new part of yourself: In order to connect more with others, look for situations in which you can be yourself, have fun, learn something and, later down the line, make contacts. Developing pastimes is very important, and they can make a huge difference in the quality of your life.
You will know you are more ready to have a new relationship when you can consider the possibility of going out with a woman without masses of anger or anxiety welling up in you, have reconnected with people in non-romantic ways, are not preoccupied with thoughts of your previous relationship, can tolerate living on your own and being by yourself, can find meaningful and interesting things to do even if you are alone and finally have developed ways to meet and engage with new people.
Feel free to drop your views and/or comments on what you agree or don't agree with.
We usually start lining up prospective 'babes', 'friends with benefits' and what have you even while the smell of our ex’s perfume is still lingering in the air. You may fantasise about having choices again, and as soon as friends see you as “single” some of them may offer to “fix you up” with their friend who is also newly single or want to just hook you up with random girls to keep your mind off your recent break/break up. It can be flattering, and it can be exciting, but more likely it is confusing. You may not have dated in years, and you may find the whole process more anxiety-provoking than fun.
When a relationship ends, we often say that we are going to be very cautious about our next one. Yet, the statistics show that single life tends to be short-lived for most of us. For guys whose girlfriend called it quits, that period of single life is really short-lived.
Why are we so quick to rush into another relationship you may ask? After all, if you have been in a committed relationship that has lasted for a year or more, what are the odds that the first or second woman you meet after the breakup is the perfect match for you?
Guys also may quickly start a new relationship because they dread the idea of being alone. But being alone does not necessarily imply being lonely. After all, some of the saddest cases of loneliness occur when you feel unloved tolerated or pitied in a relationship as was the case of some of us.
Some of us are anxious to jump into a new relationship in order to find a new sexual partner. If this is you, remember to use your brain, the part above the belt, and not the part below that all too often wants to call the shots (lol).
Personally, I feel the major reason that men prematurely get into a new committed relationship is to avoid the pain associated with the loss of the previous relationship. This is quite natural. Almost everybody will use pain killers to quell a headache, for example. However, the pain after a relationship ends is part of the recovery process. It makes you reevaluate the relationship, its history, the mistakes you made, and the meaning of it for your life. Most importantly, the pain can help you avoid making similar mistakes in the future. Unfortunately, people don’t really learn very well from their mistakes in relationships.
You are not ready to engage in another committed relationship soon after a breakup (FACT). You may think that you are, but you are overestimating yourself. If you have ever sustained a sports injury -- say, a sprained ankle while playing ball -- you probably remember being anxious to get back on the field as soon as possible after getting hurt. But if you rush to resume your old regimen before your ankle is fully healed, you will most likely re-injure it -- but this time the injury will be more severe and put you out of commission for a lot longer. This is exactly your situation now, but instead of your ankle being injured, it’s your “heart” that's suffering. Give it the time it needs to heal before you get into a new relationship.
Consider these thoughts as you get tempted to find a new girlfriend:
Don’t look to another woman to make you feel OK: If you are still hurting, don’t try to bandage the wound by explaining your plight to another female. She can't make it better, but you can. Instead of distracting yourself or looking to a new girlfriend to ease the pain you feel, work on self-improvement and self-understanding. The last thing you need is another failed relationship.
Find comfort in being alone: Strangely enough, unless you are comfortable being alone, you are probably not ready for a new relationship. The best relationships grow out of a desire to be with a particular person, not from the fear of being with no one at all. To be comfortable with being alone means you: don’t feel depressed when you don’t have someone with you; can take care of your own basic needs; don’t need someone else to entertain you; and can deal with not having a regular sexual partner.
Let go of your anger at your ex: Yes, she may have hurt you, but you learned at different points of your life and in different ways that two wrongs don’t make a right.
Be careful not to party too hard: Drowning your sorrows via drinking won’t change anything for the better. Instead, focus on improving yourself
Develop some new part of yourself: In order to connect more with others, look for situations in which you can be yourself, have fun, learn something and, later down the line, make contacts. Developing pastimes is very important, and they can make a huge difference in the quality of your life.
You will know you are more ready to have a new relationship when you can consider the possibility of going out with a woman without masses of anger or anxiety welling up in you, have reconnected with people in non-romantic ways, are not preoccupied with thoughts of your previous relationship, can tolerate living on your own and being by yourself, can find meaningful and interesting things to do even if you are alone and finally have developed ways to meet and engage with new people.
Feel free to drop your views and/or comments on what you agree or don't agree with.
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